I awoke at some hour of the dawn, feeling disturbed, and discovering tears running down my cheeks. I wiped them away and lay there in the stillness, to recall the dream I'd been having. In this dream I was searching desperately in my phone and on my computer for any video I could find of my mother and father so that I could hear my mother's voice.  As I began to awaken more fully, I tried to remember what my mother's voice sounded like, and I could not hear it. I had no trouble remembering Dad's distinct voice. I even recalled how his voice diminished into a very high-pitched squeak at the end of his life. But why couldn't I remember Mom's voice and why couldn't I find it on any of my devices? 

I called my sister to ask if she had them on any little videos, but she did not. We talked together and wondered if perhaps there were not yet phones that could take video pictures when they were still alive. Perhaps not, I don't know. I just know that it was troubling me that I could not recall the sweet voice of the one who raised me, the alto in the church choir, the one who sat at the piano in our home and played and sang along to George Gershwin songs. 

I suppose this must have been happening because I have been reading numerous books on sitting with the dying and helping to make their transitions peaceful and meaningful. So many of these books mention the power of music and singing at the bedside.  Here is a quote from Linda Bryce in her book The Courage to Care: "Bedside singers continue an ancient tradition of gathering around the bed of the one dying. Whether the individual is recently diagnosed or actively dying, singers bring music which speaks to the person at that moment. My mother lived in Vermont and when she was ill, and then dying, there were singers who visited her regularly. What a feeling of calm and peace and happiness this brought her! Music brings people back to their whole life, their whole self. There are songs from my parents' generation that everyone seems to know and that we can sprinkle into our repertoire. These include You Are My Sunshine, Over The Rainbow, and Amazing Grace. We do not seek anyone's applause. We do not perform and do not expect any such acknowledgement. Our singing is our gift to them."

Surely this will turn out to be a precious new way for me to give my gift of singing! But I am going to ask for your help and your input. Would you please sit for a moment, give yourself some time, and then send an email back to me and tell me what songs you would want to hear at your death bed? What songs would make you smile as you remember them from long ago, or give you comfort or bring you into a gentle, peaceful place?  From old hymns to new worship songs to an old ditty that your mama or your daddy used to sing, what would give you joy? I am really going to look forward to your answers and your suggestions, and from this I will make a list of songs to carry with me.

How I thank you, my friends of so many years, for still being out there and still walking the journey with me! How blessed I am!
​Kelly